stormy afternoon walk

black clouds on the horizon were growing closer. as i walked by myself down hooker street, i breathed in the humid air and began singing whatever nonsense came to mind. i poured my thoughts out and let them flow freely for all to hear. i sang about the children i saw swarming across my back yard, crushing the vegetables we were trying to grow. i sang about the pre-teen gang members i see every day, making discreet hand-offs on their second-hand bmx bikes, nodding as if to say, "yes, we are going to make it out of here one day."

arriving home, i sit in one of the tattered easy chairs on my porch and think about the families living off the drug money, holding their heads just above the water. this storm is bound to drown us all if we are not careful. how many times have i had to sell my own clothes and playthings in order to eat? i don't know how i can ever be unsatisfied with my current situation. my thoughts and songs are always drifting toward the troubles i have, but i see now...i see how useless it is to fight it.

it's useless to fight my own battles. it's like trying to swim upstream when there's a perfectly good raft floating just around the bend. i have a mediator and friend who keeps the birds singing outside my window and the herbs and sunflowers growing despite how many times the neighbor kids step on them. i have no strength to weather this storm without him.

my songs shall finally be praises full of joy and peace.
this is the day that the lord has made. i will rejoice and be glad in it.